Proverbs from Samantha

Samantha brought home a worksheet she did in her class and it was so hilarious, I had to share. her teacher highlighted the ones she thought were particularly funny. I am scanning in the first page only, and will print the funny ones from the other pages.
I hope ya'll laugh as much as we did!

A bird in the hand..."flew over me and pooped on me."
A fool and his money..."stole my money that I needed very badly."
A friend in need..."is a friend who is faking."
A man's home..."is quite messy."
A rolling stone..."is not something I want to be hit with."
A woman's place..."is where the cleaning is never done."
After a storm..."the earth is all clean." (Sweet)
All work and no play ..."is no fun today."
As you make your bed..."don't forget the bed spread."
Better late than..."than in a hurry."
Beggars can't..."beg for burgers."
Beauty is..."nice and clean"(sweet)
Do not wear out..."those new sneakers."
Don't count your chickens..."count your chiclets."
Don't cut off your nose..."or else you'll sneeze."
Don't go near the water until..."you have sunscreen."
Don't put all your eggs in..."you stomach, share them."(sweet)
Every family..."needs a pet."(sweet)
Give him an inch..."of cheese or two."
He who hesitates..."doesn't get it right."
Honesty is..."better than lying."(sweet)
It never rains..."in the desert."
Keep your mouth shut and..."it will be okay."
Laughter is..."the reward."(sweet)
Love makes the..."children say gross."
Many hands..."are usually quite small." (sweet)
"I was really"...made in heaven.(sweet)
Mind your ..."own business."

From the mouths of babes :)